Positively Speaking…

The psychology buzz word for affirmations is “self-talk” Since I was a child I have been taught to say affirmations and honestly that’s exactly what it is – but I certainly don’t mind self-talk – whichever verbiage works for you is fine!

What we think and the stories we hold onto about ourselves and our life is what governs our reality – law of attraction. Most of us try to live with a positive mindset but we need to check in with our primal voice and see what that part of us is saying. You might say, “I love myself, I’m great!” and then somewhere in your subconscious the primal self says, “But I’m fat and stupid”. The primal brain loves to give us a laundry list of what our problems and fears are and what we can and cannot have – GREAT NEWS – this we can reprogram!

We tend to want the approval of others, it starts at a very early age with our families, then friends and then society and the media take over telling us how our lives should be and how we should look and act. Let all that go – free yourself! A free self is a loving joyful self.

A consistent positive dialog with yourself can re-train your primal brain and any negative habit patterns you may have collected throughout your life. Talk to yourself lovingly all day and night and the primal brain will catch on. We just have to untangle the mess of negative messages we are given, from others and ourselves.

Remember we are hardwired to be joyful loving beings – we just need to remind ourselves – and not make it a big deal. It’s not a big deal! It does not have to be time consuming and so I have put some choices below for you. I hope you connect with one or more of them and that it can help you be the best you possible!

How do we reprogram our negative thoughts and patterns?

1. Energy Psychology / EFT – tap that negativity out!
This is an emerging field of study that I have personally found VERY helpful.
I have had the honor of being around, and even assisting him once, David Feinstein, Ph.D. who is one of the pioneers of Energy Psychology and I learned a lot from him. I use it for myself as it’s an amazing self-care technique and I have used it with clients and they have reported back with very positive results.

What Does It Do to the Brain?
“Energy Psychology works by stimulating energy points on the surface of the skin which, when paired with various psychological procedures, send signals to the brain that may impact stress chemicals such as cortisol and DHEA, deactivate limbic system arousal, and rapidly alter neural pathways.” David Feinstein, Ph.D. – learn more

Here is a particular EFT video I love and connect with by Brad Yates

An interesting article from the Huffington Post

2. Holding Your Main Neurovascular Points – your forehead
This will relax you greatly and it’s one of the only times thinking or speaking about the negative is helpful. As Donna Eden will explain our forehead(s) are our main neurovascular stress points – meaning if we hold our hand(s) gently over the forehead it will encourage blood to come to your frontal lobe – rational thought and take it away from the amygdala, the “primal” area of our brain responsible for where we hold our fears. Therefore holding the main neurovascular points – your forehead – while thinking or speaking about something that bothers you will begin to re-train your brain to not be so stressed about that subject. It has many valuable benefits and it’s so easy to do anywhere, anytime! This is easy to do for yourself but also extremely lovely to do for a loved one.

3. Temporal Tapping
This is something Eden Energy Medicine teaches but it is an ancient technique from China – the Chinese have been way ahead in the healing game for thousands of years!

This is a great way to break habits, change negative beliefs and create new positive ones. We can change this neurological reprogramming. We tap around our temporal bone – this is on our triple warmer meridian so it calms us down and opens us to new ideas. Triple Warmer governs our habits, change and our fight or flight – it can also be a radiant circuit (a pathway of joy) if you work with it in that way – you can even just talk to it and ask it to be radiant but when we calm it we are able to accept new information much easier! Also our bodies respond to tapping very well! If you tap while saying self-suggestions you are especially receptive to it. This has been clearly shown in EFT / Energy Psychology.

We tap in a negative statement on your left side because the left-brain is more critical and the right side of the brain is more open to positive statements so we tap in the positive affirmation there.

Spend some time identify what you want or want to change – use wording that feels right to you.

For example you create a statement in the negative and positive.
The negative – “I do not eat when I am stressed out” or “I no longer feel insecure and I can ask for what I want” – notice it is not really “negative”
The positive – “I eat for health and enjoy my food” or “I know my value and easily ask for what I want?”

1. Start tapping on the left side of your head at the temple, around the ear and down to the base of your head / top of your neck – while saying out loud your “negative” statement. Tap with firm but not hard pressure and do this 4-5 times.
2. Repeat the taping on the right side using your positive statement 4-5 times
3. Our bodies and triple warmer does not like change so to really change a habit or belief do this a few times a day.
4. Very important is to make sure the wording is right for you. I suggest writing it down to make sure you are comfortable with the wording and there is great power in the written word as well.

Watch Titanya Dahlin in the 1 minute video
For a deeper “how too” experience watch Donna Eden
Here is a good article about it from Psychology Today

4. Positive Affirmations and Visualizations
Here we are at what I consider the base of the basics! If you don’t already know an affirmation is a positive statement you say to yourself. I was once on my way to visit my mother in the nursing home and I was completely overwhelmed, scared, and very emotional and felt very alone. I began to repeat, “I am strong, brave and loved” and within minutes I felt relief. It doesn’t mean I went into some dreamland where reality didn’t exist, but I was able to handle the day in a loving way. I was able to be present and help her.

Visualization is seeing and feeling yourself in a situation you want. The sports world is actually very progressive in this area. They are taught to visualize – to see themselves getting that hole in one or hitting that home run. It’s about seeing and believing you can do it!

This is an excellent article about the benefits of positive thinking from the Mayo Clinic!

Another fantastic article from the Huffington Post

Read a related article from Ions about the benefits of Self-compassion

*** I will be adding more to this post so check back if you are interested and if there is topic you would like to hear more about just email me. Happy to accommodate!